The Fairy Godmother- Mercedes Lackey

In the Five Hundred Kingdoms, everyone has a role to play, whether it be that of a normal peasant or noble, or something more important. This role is determined by a force called the Tradition. Once the Tradition decides that a person is useful or important, magic will culminate around said person and push them on a path toward their inevitable destiny. However, sometimes the logistics don't always work out correctly. Elena was supposed to be a "Cinderella" in her world. She has the evil stepmother and sisters to boot, but as luck would have it, the prince of her kingdom is eleven and not a viable candidate. So instead, she finds herself apprenticed to the fairy godmother of her kingdom and is poised to take over her position as soon as she learns how to control and use the magic that the Tradition has bestowed upon her.

Overall Merit: This was a fluffy book. It was fun to read and I did enjoy the world that Lackey created. This was my first Mercedes Lackey book so I don't know a whole lot about her writing style. To sum it up in one word: cute. The book was cutesy and headed for an inevitable happy ending, which I guess is to be expected in a world governed by fairytales. It wasn't anything so amazing, but I liked the concept of the world and it was a quick read. If you're looking for intense, well-written fantasy/characters/plot then this probably isn't your book, but I mean it was a very light read--'beachy' if you will (not that I know so much about beaches, Unseelie is sadly deficient)--so I finished it in a few hours. The main gripe I had was the romance. This romantic sequence pissed me off/confused me to the extreme. More on that in 'Blush Factor'. Score- 7

Characters: Not a whole lot of substance here. As I said, the characters weren't very well-written. I didn't get any real emotion from anyone and I didn't particularly care about Alexander or Elena. They weren't annoying characters, which always buys some points in my book, but they were flat. Elena was ho-hum not that interesting and her personality wasn't there. She never expressed any real emotion--same issue with Alexander. Sure, Lackey told me he was annoyed/wanted to throttle Elena, but she didn't show me his frustration. The other characters were basically sketches, thrown in to help the plot along, but they literally had no personality or were so stereotypical that they may as well have been stick figures. Score- 5

Blush Factor: *SPOILERS* Don't even get me started. This was one of the worst romances I have ever seen. First off, you knew that Elena and Alexander were going to get together as soon as she drags him away from his quest to 'punish' him. Then, he tries to sexually assault her, which I find is never conducive to any sort of kind feelings. After, when he becomes more civil, they start having freaky shared sex dreams and somehow along the lines end up falling in love. And finally, out of the blue he asks her if she's been having the same dreams as him and then when she says yes they go up to his rooms and have a weird variation of sex. What the Hell? Score- 3

Structure: I really did like the world, which is why I give some kudos to this book. I liked the pseudo fairytale setting and the magical rules of the world. Lackey gave good definition to her magic and the rules governing the world, which was amenable since so many writers neglect to do that. The story wove in and out of Elena's and Alexander's perspectives, which was standard, but I wished there had been more definition when the perspectives jumped. I got a line break and that was it, just a formatting issue, but still something to note. If you do decide to check out the book, do it for the world structure. Score- 8

Plot: I mean there was a plot, it wasn't a very good plot, but it was a plot all the same. I hated the ending, it was extremely rushed. It felt like Lackey was trying to avoid major conflict, realized that was impossible, and ended up putting it in at the end and sweeping it under the carpet as quickly as she could. The premise was decent, not super strong, but not awful either. Lackey could have done something much more interesting with the world. There really wasn't enough conflict. Elena mastered her magic in what felt like moments, Alexander was helped by fairies, and the final 'epic' battle was over in a few pages. No one died. Everyone lived happily ever after, even though the message that Lackey kept driving home in the book was that it didn't work like that. Score- 6

Vervain Says: "Fairy Godmothers are responsible for quest giving, testing heros, and keeping magic from running amok."

Meet My Assistant

What are you gawping at? No. Not a dragon. A wyvern. Why don't you ask her yourself? She can talk you know.

Vervain says: "I've never met a mortal before, but I always thought they'd look more appetizing."

Well that's rude. She doesn't breathe fire you know, and she'll only spit poison  if you really upset her.

Vervain says: "I think we should turn them in to the Magistrate."

Of course this is coming from an illegal pet who happens to live in my library. Since she's here however, feel free to direct any questions to her. Also, from now on she'll be defining important terms that are crucial to understanding each novel.

Sword of Fire and Sea- Erin Hoffman

When Vidarian's great-grandfather married a fire priestess, he swore an alliance with the High Temple of Kara'zu (headquarters of the fire priestesses). This agreement is called into play, when the high priestess Endera summons Vidarian to honor his family legacy and escort a promising young priestess named Ariadel to a different temple in the south. Since Ariadel was caught by the Vkortha, a group of rogue magic users, she has been in constant danger of capture. Vidarian's job is to see her safely to the new temple where she can seek refuge from the Vkortha. At least in theory, this is what the story is supposed to be about. 


Overall Merit: I found that the story I was promised fell flat and well I'm amazed I forced myself to finish the book. It wasn't that the writing was inherently bad, it was just the storytelling ability wasn't there and neither was the character development. I don't quite know why I even bothered to finish it, maybe so that I could give an accurate review to the imaginary people who are reading this blog. Anyway, please don't read this book unless your only other option is Twilight, then by all means go ahead. Score- 4 (this is mainly because I really liked the cover...) 


Characters: Were there even characters in this story? No, not really. They were caricatures if anything. I mean I've read flat characters before, but usually there's at least one person who saves the day, even if they're in a supporting role. This book gave me nothing to work with. There was no drive to do anything, the characters simply accepted the roles they were given because either "the goddesses said so" or they had some innate intuition that it was "their destiny". If characters don't have a legitimate reason for going on a quest or fighting against a force then the readers don't care if they do it or not. In fact, I cared so little about these characters that they could have been brutally murdered and I wouldn't have done more than shrug. Also, I couldn't even figure out who the antagonist was supposed to be. The Vkortha were pathetic and played a minimal role, somehow the Imperial Army showed up in the last fifty pages, and then the high priestess suddenly became quasi evil. It didn't make sense at all. Oh, one thing I had a MAJOR issue with was the fact that the chaos goddess comes in and says "Correctamundo" and "See ya later alligator". Even in a realistic fiction book no one says that, but she's a goddess--a chaos goddess nonetheless. Score- 2 


Blush Factor- This was also miserable, but that should be self explanatory because if the characters have nothing to say for themselves, then they certainly can't have interesting relationships with each other. From essentially the first page you knew there was going to be something between Vidarian and Ariadel, which is fine. However, there was no build up. One minute they were simply companions on a journey and the next they were cuddling and kissing. There was no transition and when the romantic bit came about I actually had to go back and reread the section because I thought I had missed something. The romance is misplaced and unrealistic and if anything it detracted from the already pathetic story. Score-2 


Structure- Another thing I had an issue with. The transitions were abominable in this novel, it kept jumping over hours, and even days at a time, leaving the reader confused and disoriented. It's like, "I don't care if you put a little wave icon in between sections every time you shift; I still have no idea what's going on!" Otherwise, the story was traditionally linear and only told from one perspective. Score- 3 


Plot- The plot had potential to be good. I did like the magical hierarchy in the world and I thought that if done correctly the story would have been enjoyable. However, the entire thing was completely botched. The story was trite and it didn't flow at all. There were too many elements going on at the same time. If Hoffman had simply taken out one or two of the irrelevant plot tangents and focused on the main story thread it would have been much more successful. Score- 5 (for potential) 


In summation: Do not read this book unless you somehow find yourself in a Saw movie and you have no other option.